Thursday 11.22.12

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.
It’s true that I generally don’t celebrate most holidays in the traditional sense, but I still have a love of the little traditions that come with some of them. One of those traditions is to make a list on Thanksgiving of the things and the people that I’m thankful for. So far, 2012 has been appropriately an apocalyptic year for me. While Quetzalcoatl isn’t likely to make an appearance next month, my life went through a pretty major shift and I’m still seeing the growth and reward as a result of it. So. Here’s my list of Thanksgiving thanks, in no particular order.

  • Erin.
    What can I say about Erin that I haven’t already said before? She’s my best friend. Our friendship has evolved so much over the last few years and I know that with absolute certainty that she always has my back. When I got engaged, Erin was an obvious choice as a Groomsman, and even though it didn’t come to fruition I know that she’s still there keeping me sane, and safe.
  • Bethany.
    If Erin is my best friend, Bethany is my… Bethany. The entirety of her is perfect to me. The only person I’ve ever put on a pedestal that actually deserves it. We go a week at a time without talking and then just when I think about how much I miss her I’ll get a cute text or a photograph of her. When we first met the connection was immediate; I knew that she’d be  part of my life for the rest of it. Our friendship solidified in 2005 and we became family. Plain and simple. I can’t wait to get my little BT+SP Bee tattoo so I have a little permanent reliquary to remind me of how much I adore her. Not that I need it.
  • Alissa.
    There’s no mentioning my friendship with Alissa that doesn’t begin with ‘When I first met her, I wanted to slap her in the face.’ It’s tradition now, and since this whole entry is about tradition, there you have it. When I first met her she was a bratty teenager and Christ on Calvary I wanted to lay one on her. Seven years later and she’s an amazing woman who offers me so much unconditional love and support that, even though I still want to smack her, it’s a different kind of smack. We’ve been stealing time together more often lately, and I’m thrilled.
  • Denim Dan.
    How could I forget about her? We met earlier in the year and realized that we were already old friends. We’re told that on the second day we hung out we were already finishing each other’s sentences and already had in-jokes. I’m rarely so comfortable around new people, but she just puts me at ease, instantly. She’s moving to the east coast soon, and I’ll have her closer to me. I’m very excited.
  • My Family.
    I’m the luckiest son of a bitch in the world right now. I get to work four days a week with my Brother and my Sister in law. I get to see my nephew B4 growing into who he’s going to become. I get to have fun at work- our job is helping people have a good time. How rad is that? When folks want to go out and have fun, they come to us. It’s a great feeling to be part of people’s lives like that. So I get to spend time around my siblings and have fun. All the time. I’ve said it before, but my worst day at the bar, when everything is just working against us and you just want to punch a wall, has been better than my best day at And my schedule allows me to travel, so I’ve been able to get up to NYC more often to see my Sister Kathleen and Brother in law Atom more often in the last few months than in the previous year. And I’ve recently ‘adopted’ a new member of the family, my housemate Megh. I like to tell people that she’s my daughter, and thankfully she’s on board with that. It’s nice to have her in the house; we rarely see each other but it’s very comforting to know she’s here.
  • Bailey.
    The Stink Weasel. Who’d have thought it? A creepy, stinky little beast that lurks around my bedroom while I sleep, smells like fish and constantly does inappropriate things that make everyone uncomfortable and he’s the love of my life right now. He cheers me up when I’m down, encourages me to take little walks throughout the day and waits, tail wagging, to greet me when I get home. He’s my consistency.
  • My new friends.
    I’ve been a ‘proud hermit’ for years and I defined myself by how reclusive I was. I made my ex my life. Turns out that I put my money on the wrong horse and when all was said and done I was out a partner (as well as some jewelry and a leica) and starting my life over from scratch. I had Erin, Bethany, Alissa and my family, sure, but I found myself lonely and in need of new friends to augment what my existing friends already provided. And I’ve been lucky enough to do just that. Make new friends. Be social. Create a circle of people who I care about and who care about me. It’s been great. I’m glad you folks are in my life, and I promise to try to be as good to you as you’ve been to me.
  • Therapy.
    I bring up therapy from time to time, but not nearly as much as I should. At first I didn’t know how things were going to work out between my therapist and I, but lately things have really been clicking. After a good session I feel energized and take what we talked about to heart. I’ve seen major advances in my life since starting with Cynthia and I’m excited about the changes we still have to take on.
  • Health/Fitness/Gym.
    I admit it. I’ve become ‘that guy’ since May. Sixty pounds lost before the weight gain from muscle building started, and my body is still in a state of change and it’s amazing. Sometimes I forget myself and shout from the rooftop about getting healthier, but it’s just because i want everyone to see the benefits I’ve  seen. I’ve changed my eating habits, added a varied workout routine to my day and work overtime to make sure that I’m taking care of my body like I (try to) take care of my mind.
  • Travel.
    One of the benefits of my schedule is the ability to travel again. I hadn’t been doing as much over the last two years, but I’m finally able to start doing a little bit more traveling. This year I’ve been to Vegas, Santa Cruz, San Francisco, NYC, DC and I have Boston and Florida trips coming up soon. I’d missed it. Now that I have a dog sitter that I trust I’m a little more flexible with being able to get out of town for a little bit. It really clears my head and reboots it to just lose myself somewhere.

Today my friend Mara and I are  going to be spending Thanksgiving with my family; eating delicious food (did I mention that we bought four dozen Macarons?) laughing and telling stories, and then off to work. Regardless of how you spend your holidays, I hope that you have a great day, and that you’re as blessed as I am to have the kind of friends and family that you know are thankful for you, too.

Photo: PA Dutch Hex Sign.
Inset: Alissa Denim Dan Bethany Bailey.


Thursday 10.04.12

Today I was a lot less grumpy/emo.
While there was a lot of Smiths action on my playlists today I’ve yet to resort to posting lyrics, so you can take that as a sign that I’m doing ok for now despite being kind of freaked out about the next few weeks and how they’re going to treat me. I try to keep up the PMA (which includes allowing myself to type PMA despite my contempt of it, ASAP and FYI) while dealing with the bad parts as they come. So far it’s been pretty successful.

My friend Erin does a ‘Things I love Thursday” update on her Facebook (started it on her IAM) so I’m going to list some things I love today as a talisman against feeling grumpy.

  • Erin. Obviously. She’s rad and I’m glad she’s my friend.
  • Mara. She should be doing homework right now, but instead she’s talking to me.
  • Occult Vibrations. My tattoo blog. Didn’t think I’d keep it up this long, but.. it rocks. Tomorrow I’m filming a thing on fitness for tattooers. Fun.
  • NYCC. Pushead! I’m going Saturday and don’t have to rush.
  • Morrissey. Deal with it.
  • October. Despite all of the emoness… it’s my favorite month. I’ll eventually get back to it being MY month not ‘our’ month.
  • Cooking. Low fat, lean protein, heavy cruciferous greens…. and making it taste good. I haven’t been cooking enough.
  • Flirting.
  • Bailey.

Today I managed to fit Phantasm into my 31 Days of Horror Films. It didn’t hold up. Not at all. I mostly goofed around online while it played. Hopefully tomorrow is better. I’m thinking something Italian. Giallo. Argento probably. As we get closer to the big day I’ll start watching less horror and more specifically Halloween centered films. And I still need to make Halloween plans.

Photo: Jack o’ Lantern ceramic!

Thursday 09.27.12

Today kicked my ass.
If Tuesday was a lazy go to the movies sort of lackadaisical day, Wednesday was an industrious self imposed ballbreaker. I didn’t really know how it was going to go, since I woke up much later than normal. Noon. That should’t be that much of a treat given the hours I keep- staying up late and sleeping past noon should be my prerogative not my treat, but for some reason I just can’t trick my body into getting more than a few hours of sleep. But I woke up feeling rested and decided to put some extra gym time in to counterbalance how little I did/badly I ate while on vacation.

After my normal toning and hour of cardio on the elliptical I decided to push a little harder and take a spinning class to top it all off. The class was so-so. I didn’t want to stay too late so I didn’t go with my normal instructor; big mistake. The group dynamic of a spinning class is held together with a really good teacher and the early class just didn’t have that. He was sort of snarky and didn’t really mix things up which led to a sort of dull workout. Sure I still got the cardio, and I still felt it in my legs… but he just didn’t keep me engaged. C’est la Vie. I told Michael that I didn’t like the other instructor’s class, so from now on I’ll just stick with him.

I thought I was done with exertion for the day, but at 11:30pm my friend Mara asked me to go on a bike ride with her, and since we rarely get time together (she’s a busy student at UArts) I jumped out of the epsom bath I was relaxing in and pedaled over to her place right before the rain started.

Mara is always up for adventure, so the rain didn’t stop us and we made it to the Art Museum before it really started getting wet. We hid under a group of trees and caught up and stayed mostly dry (but my fenderless bike had sprayed my entire back with muck, so it didn’t really matter that the rain didn’t get me) until the rain passed, then biked over to LOVE PARK to take some #mycityatnight pictures of the sign/fountain. Usually there are sketchy people lurking around Love Park, but I guess the rain washed them away. I decided to test my mettle, take off my shoes and go for a stroll in the cesspool that is the fountain pool. Luckily for me I have my Hep A & B vaccinations. Still- it was fun and added a nice little cap to the ride before biking back to Mara’s (my first time visiting her new apartment that she’s lived in over a year!) and hanging out until I finally demanded she put herself to bed.

The most exciting news of the day (unless you consider discussion of my cardiovascular health absolutely
magnificent) was that while I was in Santa Cruz, Robert and Carmela set a projector up on the ‘Dance Floor’ of our bar that runs through an AppleTv.

Let that sink in- I now have access to my own movie theater. Sure we can stream Netflix, Hulu+ and all that jazz, but any video file that I drop into iTunes can be streamed through the digital projector and on to a 20 foot wide silver screen.

I don’t see me leaving for home immediately after my shifts anymore….. because I’ll be in our private movie theater. Yes. I just like saying it out loud. To say that I’m excited would be an understatement. I just converted Jodorowsky’s THE HOLY MOUNTAIN and a few Kenneth Anger films to test out after work tonight…. will probably have to mess around with the compression but it’s a great start.

And I just remembered that I have therapy today. In six hours. Guess I should probably call it a night?

Photos: Love Park after Midnight.