I have to take the bad with the good.
It seems to work out that way, most time, for me at least. That when my life is going good I have to put someone else’s life out of balance as a result. Today I did that. Hurt someone’s feeling because I’m happy. It really sucks because she’s a really good friend, but if my presence in her life causes her to be sad I’ll just have to step back a bit and hope that in time she’s ok with being my friend.
This whole ‘having feelings’ thing is a mixed bag, ya’all.
So yeah. I guess that it’s obvious that I’m smitten. I had made a pledge to remain single for the entirety of 2013; I’m not sure what’s going to happen between the crush and I but I’m pretty dang excited by the prospect of finding out. We go back a few years and she’s always been someone that I admired, but we’ve only recently connected on a different level. It’s exciting to get to know her; to see how we click and where we differ, to get to know about her versus the idea of her.
Right now we’re keeping things mostly quiet while we figure out what the heck we’re going to do; stay friends or pursue. something more. I think there’s no wrong answer here. I won’t deny the possibility of something really rad with someone who makes me all a’flutter just because I had said I wanted to be single for the rest of the year, nor will I rush into anything just because someone makes me all a’flutter. So we’ll let it happen how it happens and I’ll keep smiling.