Friday 12.21.12

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There’s no part of me that’s not rainsoaked right now.
I biked home in a raincoat that didn’t belong to me; my iPhone was wrapped up inside slit open bubble wrap and my backpack left at the bar for fear of it getting soaked through. The wind was fighting me the entire way and the few cabs that were out weren’t really playing by the agreed to rules of the road.

If there’s an apocalypse coming, it’s the perfect weather for it.

I was lucky enough, years ago, to have a very brief email correspondence with Dr. Terrence McKenna on ethnobotany, Time Wave Zero and Novelty and the ‘self-transforming machine elves’. He answered my questions, which were admittedly fairly open ended and abstract, and really helped me get my start on a path that I’m still exploring almost 14 years later.

Novelty Theory suggests that on December 21 of 2012 AD, at the coincidence of the moment of the solstice and the heliacal rising of the galactic center, levels of planetary novelty will exponentially increase. Theory does not make clear the nature of the ultranovel event, however.

I’ve never really thought that today was going to be a literal apocalypse, but I’d at least hoped for some kind of paradigm shift. As I’m laying here in bed, as always Bailey curled happily at my side and some bad movie on in the background, I realize that this year WAS a paradigm shift for me. A little personal armageddon that’s changed me to the core. I’ve spent the last few days tumblr_meh17kfrmc1rt1nbto1_500working on my traditional ‘year end’ post and my mind has been shifting through so many memories that have been making me feel alternately melancholy and content. Sometimes it’s the same memory that elicits both. So surreal how it’s all worked out. Working out, I guess, since every day brings with it some new revelation.  I know I go on and on about this more often than is entertaining, but when you’re someone who’s 100% locked into your own self identity it’s an amazing and humbling reality when it all comes crashing down. Things that seemed so important end up as nothing more than afterthoughts, people who you couldn’t imagine ever being without become memories; condensing the good and the bad into an anecdote, becoming less and less powerful in your pantheon of lost loves or friendships until you barely think of them at all, except for when you do. So regardless of how the world fairs tonight- I’m going to sleep knowing that my change is already here, and not over thinking what comes next.

Photo: Bucky Ball!

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