I’d love to sleep in.
Like really sleep late, a whole day in bed where I actually asleep. One of my bartenders told me last night that sometimes he gets 12 hours of sleep. In one day. I meant to sleep in today. I was exhausted when I finally drifted off at 4:00am, my bedroom was warm and quiet and dark, Bailey was settled in beside me snuggly in his bed… and then 9am happened. As soon as sanitation came down my street- loud trucks, banging garbage cans, garbagemen shouting… I was awake. And once awake I’m pretty much unable to get back to sleep. I guess I should count my lucky stars that I got 5 hours; but either way it’s going to make for a long day today.
Went to therapy yesterday. For the first time in a while it just seemed like spinning wheels. Maybe I was having an off day, who knows. Just didn’t feel like I accomplished anything other than spending money that I could have put on my electric bill. I hate days like that; when I feel like I could have stayed home. I’ve been going for almost eight months, and it’s been really great for me, but I wonder sometimes if there’s going to be a logical closure point; when either my therapist or I decide that every two weeks would work, or that I’ve reached a point where I don’t ‘need’ therapy. I have the next two weeks off, so maybe I’ll get some perspective while I’m in Boston and Florida and either come back refreshed on the 17th or decide that I need to take a breather from going every week/at all. I’m probably just being grumpy. I know that I’m certainly better off than I was eight months ago- not just processing the whole ‘getting dumped/getting robbed by the woman I was going to marry’ thing, but how I deal with patience, boundaries, emotions etc- Just not sure where to go from here.
Money is going to be really tight for the Boston/Florida trips, but I really need to get away. At least in Florida I can budget better by cooking my own meals by stocking up on groceries from Publix, along with the exception of the occasional Jimbo’s trip. Tighten the belt. Luckily I’ve had a good string of AirBnB guests the last few days so there’s that extra money coming in to pay some bills before I go. The folks that were here the last few days, Amber and Erin, were the nicest guests I’ve had so far. Really friendly, fun people who felt like old friends not paying guests. I love it when that happens. The folks I’m hosting tonight (which I should really be preparing for instead of typing on the internets) were a last minute booking- they need to check in later today and just booked a few minutes ago. Luckily I didn’t go to the movies this afternoon like I had planned and I’ll have time to change the bedding, tidy up the washroom, do dishes, etc and have the house ready for them by the time they arrive.
Other than that one really weird guest who left immediately after checking in, I’ve had some really positive experiences on AirBnB. I think the next time I have a trip (past Boston and Florida) I’m going to stay at least one night at an AirBnB house and experience the whole process from the point of view of a guest. It’s got to be strange just making yourself at home in a stranger’s house. As a host it’s pretty surreal to come home and just have someone you don’t know sitting in your living room, drinking out of your glassware. Not bad, just takes some getting used to. Maybe seeing it from the other side will give me some perspective on how to be a better host. I try to take all of the feedback I get from my guests even when it seems unreasonable (one of my guests thought there were too many Black people in Philadelphia… I just told her I’m sorry she didn’t like my city) and turn it into improvements to my hosting.
The next few days are going to go by pretty quickly- work, spend time with Natalie and then get on the road to Boston. Updates will come as time permits.
Photo: Robert and I. Oldschool. Springhead Pioneers!